23 October 2013

same shit different day always the same... BS

in this kind of situation
my depression becomes higher every second i breath
no more sluts in my life!
no more obstacles! I SUPPOSED
no more TEARS to cry! i just wonder why
NO MORE

the life of being a jerk
its quite easy to handle
but the life of mischievious and problematic student's
that one
i cant never be pleased of

for sure nobody knows what i have been through these days
remarkable days goes by
wonderful time i had
all of them felt like
dust
pretty dust flown away by night and day

im not like none of me
im now feels so empty
the space that i wanted to be filled
i losts it again
and again
and again

gezzz...
terrible feelings
terrible thoughts
terrible days

somehow
this can wake me up
wake me up from the sleep
that i've been do for soo long
infact
no one knows what will happen next?
for sure
no one knows about it

it's not about love
it's not about heart
it's about ATTITUDES

the A word make me feel ashmed of myself
the A word make me feel doomed
the A word kind of chocking me from the back

i dont need no more backstabbers
what i need right now it's just hope and MIRACLE to happen

below the wind, into the light
flooded by tears, and will be more blood?

now im doomed
doomed in myself

doomed

xoxoxo

13 October 2013

BACKSTABBERS: ex-bestfriends at KPTM KL.

first2 aku nak tulis adalah ayat2 kasar yang boleh dijadikan puisi untuk surat cinta korang dan boyfriend korang sekarang

well...you guys memang dah buat TAHIK dgn aku sekarang

dripada semester satu, ade je budak carik pasal ngan aku..
sorang budak dpd negeri yang aku tak ank sebut kat sini
budak tu sumpah kepala butui dia buat tahik ngan aku
sumpah aku memang mengalami pendarahan hidung lah kalau aku bergaduh tangan dgn dia
sebab dia memang memiliki tahap kesialan yang melampaui batasan waktu
katanya.....
dia bukan shja tidak digemari oleh aku malah tidak juga digemari ramai di Malaysia kini
Malaysia masa depan wallahualam

ok
aku skrang bukan nak ckp hal budak yg semester 1 tuh
kali ni aku nak cakap sal budak yang duduk bersama dgn aku drpd semester 1 sampai lah semester 4

aku mewakili nama diorg Katik and Katak
ok

aku sgt lah rapat dgn Katik dan Katak ni
hari2
setiap hari sentiasa bersama
tak dewlah setiap hari
most of the times lah kan
means bertiga

honestly
aku lagi rapat dgn Katak lah
aku ni bukan peminat Katak sebenarnya
tapi memandangkan Katak ni mmg rapat dgn aku (istilah nya berpura2 rapat yerrr)
soo
aku terima jelah ceritanya

so
si Katak ni sememangnya aku PERNAH syg lah
uisshhh
ko dah tak layak nak dpt syg dpd aku Katak oiiii
HAHAHAHAHAHA

menagis kat bahu aku
mengadu dgn aku
menggila bagai
meroyan
meraung
membodohkan diri dgn jantan ntah dtg drpd mana ntah
membangangkan diri sbb cinta bodah sial kimak ko tuh
menjadikan maruah wanita tuh bawah tapak kaki jantan2 yg ko suka tuh kan????

bercinta???
eh ko paham ke apa bende cinta ni????
yg ko tahu menggila meroyan
membanggakan sgt ngan cinta hati ko yerr katak
blablabla

aku takkan ckp jantan tuh bodoh
aku akan ckp ko yang bodoh
sbb ko yg bagy free cintan cintun ko yg hingusan tuh kat jantan2 yg ko gilakan

ehhh....
aku dh pesan byk kali
cari LELAKI
bukan jantan
Katak bingai

bila katak ni mengadu mcm2 kat aku
aku jd sebak
kenapalah ko ni bodoh sgt eak????
umur baru stahun jagung
tp gatal nak menikah bagai
ehhh...diploma pun ko tak settle lagi
mimpi sampai kemana hala ntah
gatai jugak puki ko tuh nak bermanja-manjaan dgn jantan kan
skg ni dah bertudung litup
tutup aurat bagai
ajak g lepak kat club ngan aku terus decline
saje nk bgy bukak skit mata tu
ko DECLINE? and aku totally RESPECT keputusan ko katak

then
mandi swimming pool pun tak nak sbb tutup aurat dh
bertaubat dh ke kaw?????? oh my god!
seriously????
ok
aku akan ckp
alhamdulillah

tp!
weyhh....!
lau dh berubah buat cara berubah yg betul2 bahhh
ni mengongkek ngan jantan mana ntah????!!!!
geli aku tahu tak
HILANG RESPECT AKU KAT KAW

aku jd gay mcm ni pun
AT LEAST aku crystal clear dgn diri aku kpd ko
tp ko???????
semua benda aku dah terbukti cerita aku dgn ko
ko kenal aku siapa kan?????
main sembur kalau tak suka
sbb ko tu aku anggap sahabat aku
biarlah lain umur pun kan???
itu aku

lagi satu
tudung litup
baju labuh
tutup tetek kaw
tutp buntut kaw
tp
puki terbukak!!!!

sal persahabatan pulak
weyhhh
rumah aku kat Subang je kot
dpd Ampang tak sampai 5jam ko balik kampung kot
20minit jek
aku tolong ko jaga motor bagai
aku tak mintak balas lah weyh
punyalah aku concern takut moto kaw kena curik
sanggup dtg dpd Subang amek moto ko
redah hujan lebat
aku sendiri yg redah lah bodoh!!!!
ko plak boleh wassap aku
kata tak nak amek moto
sbb jauh
sbb tak berani jln malam
sbb ssh

aku nages ok time wassap tuh!
ko ade amek tahu kew???
aku nages pun sbb
aku kurang cerdik dlm memilih SAHABAT jugak lah

lansung ta de effort
itu dinamakan KAWAN? SAHABAT???
weyh
ko RACUN lahhh!!!
ko TOXIC
ko bahan buangan
sbb tu aku panggil ko katak ok???!!!!

kemain jauh yerr Subang ni
ok lets say lah
aku terima alasan ko
yewlah
rumah aku jauuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sgt kan

tup tap
aku terbaca pulak post twitter
FB ko katak
katanya nak sgt
rindu
kenangan lama
#throwback
nak sgt jumpa jantan2 ko tuh

semata2 nak jumpa boyfriend?
boleh pulak katak ni 
ke Port Dickson???? SANGGUP??!
ke Rawang????? SANGGUP???
ke Shah Alam?????? SANGGUPPPP BEB???!!!!

weyh
lau ko sesak nafas
nak mampus kat rumah
sape yg tolong ko g spital?
jaga ko?
ko ssh nak study?
petua sape bagy?
lambat g class
naik keta
sape hantar?????

ade pakwe ko dpd rawang shah alam PD tu dtg buat semua tu utk ko????
ade kew?????

and
fyi Shah Alam tu sbelah Subang je
MORON

soo...nampak sgtlah yg hati ko tu penuh dgn dusta nestapa lah babi!
ehhhh
aku marah betul niehhh!!!!

aku jaga ko
aku baik dgn ko
mcm adik2 aku dh aku jaga
boleh bgi alasan mcm tuh???
Subang jauhlah,ssh lah,,takutlah...blablablabla

stop it
you are just a FUCKING BULL-SHIT's person i've ever met
im not sorry for this time
its just true enough
after 4semester baru ko tunjuk perangai sebenar ko kan katak????
how stupid i am to be a friend, was a friend of yours katak
im not a good friend but aku cuba
tapi kaw??????
blah lah
tak payah tunggu masa2 yg baik utk tegur n cakap ngan aku lagi
aku meluat menyampah dan fed-up

sambung sal katik lak

nak jd cerita
aku mmg tak rpat dgn si katik
sbb katik ni mcm batu haramjadah betul
keras nauzubillah!!!
mcm patung pun ada
otak bijak tp perangai mcm ko nak duduk dlm dunia yg penuh dgn robot dan ko jek yg rule the world
maksud aku ko nak hidup
yg org lain mmg salah dimata ko

ehh
wlpun kan katik
aku tulis sal ko ni kan katik
lau ko baca ni lah
mcm salah je kan aku nya andaian
mcm salah je telahan aku sal perangai ko kan? kan? kan?

itu adalah kerana
AKU MMG TAK PERNAH KENAL DIRI KO YANG SEBENAR!!!!
sial betul lah
mmg muka korg ni muka
BACKSTABBER sialan betul!!!

ok
sambung lagi
si katik ni mmg byk dh buat hal sepanjang aku blajar kat KPTM ni
sumpah
byk gila buat hal
dgn balak2 nya
dgn curang nya
dgn balak2 nya
dgn curang nya

kiranya dia ni pun kaki menggatal jugak
muka mmg ada gaya lah
lelaki sampai berdosa pandang dia DUA kali
but
agak bingai disitu sbb
she's a PLAYER
PLAY-GIRL
thats all i can say 

haaa
itu je lah perkara yg mendatangkan kemuntahan dlm hari2 aku bila bersama ko DULU
soo
now aku dh tak muntah2 lagi
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

soo
hal katik
AKU TAK HERAN SANGAT
SEBAB SI KATIK NI MEMANG BUKAN SAHABAT AKU
ko tahu ke maksud sahabat ni?
mcm tak jek?

ini semua
CUMA LAKONAN SEMATA2 DAHULU KALA
AKU MENGAKULAH JUGAK PART NI
HAHAHAHAHA

mmg aku rpat ngan korg
rapat gila DULU lah

not until aku ad kes in semester 2
sal scandal pukimak all the stuffs

amboihhhh
kemain lagi korang benci si pukimak tuh kan????????
kenal kan sape pukimak tu kan????
masa tuh mmg aku bodoh sbb gilakan pukimak tuh
tiap kali aku sebut jek nma dia

katik - eiiiii...gelilah,,tak boleh bygkan lah muka dia!!!! mcmanalah dlm class nnt kan??? eii..jgn sebut lah...eiiii...
katak - please,,,dont say anything about her....disgusting sgt!!!!!

kemain lagi menjijikan kan....
pantang sebut
tak supportive LANGSUNG!!!!
masa tu lah
aku emosi lebih kan
skarang alhamdulillah aku aman
TANPA korang berdua!
HAHAHAHAHAAHA

bila aku dh tahu yg korg mmg benci geli jijik gila dgr sal pukimak tuh
mmg aku kompem lah korg is ON MY SIDE

but
at the end of the day
boleh pulak study sesama ngan pukimak tuh??????
ehhhhhh.,,,,
dh muntah2 geli2 keluar ulat semua tuh
ko jilat telan kunyah balik apa yg korang cakap kat aku kn??????????

ini punca UTAMA kenapa aku mmg meluat nk cuba tegur korang ok
MELUAT

aku baruuuu jek tgok KEEK si katik tadi
perghhh
keluar video si katik dan katak dan pukimak study bersama2 di slh satu kedai yg menarik sgt utk aku dan aku tak pernah sampai lagi
HAHAAHAHHAAA

ade bukti yg menunjukkan korg mmg boleh makan dan jilat balik muntah korang dulu
korg marah kaw2
benci habis2 kat pukimak tuh
boleh lak study bersama???????????????????????

WHAT THE FUCK LAAAA BITCHESSSS!!!!!!????
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!
BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!BACKSTABBERS!!!!
haaaa
panjang plak BACKSTABBERS!!!! aku ni kan
gayytoohh..!
AHAHAHAAHAA

mengapalahhh aku terlalu baik sgt dgn org yg dah terang2 takkan hargai aku?????
yg mmg langsung takkan nampak aku ni wujud???
walaupun aku ni bam bam???
mmg betullah kata org

KALAU KITA SYG ORG TU
KITA JAGA DIA
BELAI DIA
LAYAN DIA ELOK2
MMG DIA TAKKAN NAMPAK KEBAIKAN YG KITA BUAT
MMG DIA AKAN TAK ENDAH LANGSUNG TTG KITA
SBB DIA TAHU KITA TETAP ADA DGN DIA
CUMA KEMATIAN KITA JE AKAN DIA PERASAN
BETAPA KEHILANGAN SEORG KAWAN YG
BAIKKKKK PUNYA

masuk lift tekan sendrik plak
HEHEHEHE
aku tak bodoh cuma cuai memilih kawan
HAHAHAHA

now
aku dh lega dh tulis ni
harap si katak baca
sampaikan pada si katik
sampaikan pada pukimak
sbb aku pun pernah maki pukimak tu dulu dlm blog aku ni
dia buat hal yg menggangu hidup aku suatu ketika dahulu kala
masing2 dah baca
alhamdulillah
lega rasanya

at least korang dpt tahu kenapakah aku tidak lagi berusaha utk menegur korg dan sebab2 nya
aku sendri dah mengaku dlm penulisan blog aku kali ni yg aku mmg terkilan sgt sbb menyanyangi dua manusia yg salah
korg dtg dlm hidup aku kat kolej ni
for a lesson
not for a reason
semua ni akan kekal mcm ni
it will remains forever
for me
but for the future
ALLAH yg tentukan
kalau hati aku lembut aku akan bertukar!!!
tp

KALAU AKU MATI
JANGAN DATANG TENGOK MAYAT AKU
DAN MENGALIRKAN AIRMATA KESEDIHAN(konon2nya sedih lah sgt kan tgok aku mati)
SEBAB AKU TAK MAMPU DAH NAK JADI BAHU UNTUK KORANG MENGADU DOMBA
DAN TANGAN AKU PUN DAH TAK BOLEH LAP KAN AIRMATA KORANG


hati tgh marah lagi ni

p/s: semoga kejayaan dan kebahagiaan si katak dan si katik ... (doaku terputus mcm tu je, sbb? paham2 lah kan... aku ada hati dan perasaan... aku manusia biasa)


BACKSTABBERS!!!!

01 July 2013

Holiday in Kuching Sarawak 2nd.June - 12th.June 2013 [PART 1]

assalamualaikum wbt

it"s been a long time that i didnt write anything in my blog. yes, yes i am. i am lazy ad quite busy these days.
haha... some of my memories just remains in my head but some of it i will keep it save in this blog.

ok now, lets talk about my first experience on flight.
gosh!
im fucking scared and phobia about floating. yeah. floating on water just the same as sleeping on bed, but on air??? that is so far away from my imagination

i never been on flight, honestly
but in the mean time, my hubby really wanted me to follow her back to kuching Sarawak.
if i had a choice, to choose any transportation to go there, i will go by a ship! haha! insane!!!

yeah, adrenaline rush. thats the words that could describe how scared and panic i am that day
and at last, i made it!!! to Borneo!!! weeee~~!!!!


thats me. haha. the first experience ever! the best birthday gift ever from my dear husband, Oja.
thank you sayang for such an amazing opportunity and gift! muaahhh!!!!

ok lets get back to the story.
my tears dropped when i first saw all the scenery and the majestic of Allah creation. speechless













i arrived at Sarawak safely after 1hour and 45minutes journey.

the excitements continues

xoxoxo

27 January 2013

this post goes to my cartoon whom i ditto the most !

assalamualaikum WBT

hye baby
here i am
writing this post for you
just because i have something to say and some more to learn about us

first thing first, i am sorry if im not perfect for you, but i must to stand for that we could be the perfect two
the perfect two means?
im the missing jigsaw and you are the whole boxes of puzzles
you came to me just in the right time
if i hold still and not doing anything
you may be gone like a wind
but my heart says 'stop her,let her in'
then, i also give you a big waiting hug and catch your hand before you went away

now, here we are
together like a swan lake

yeah
im doing this, doing that, doing all the madness that you could stand for many3 times
but,, the best part is, when i get mad, you also mad as me
that time, i knew that you are not the same as them before
you have a Principe that no one can change
you have the ability to be a leader
yaaa..i know, when you read this part
you will actually cross something in your head
'how could i manage ou if you are stubborn like fucking bullshit lesbian????'

hahahaha
baby
let me make sure something
i rather be conquer by you
cause i know that how much you care and being professional in ever single situations that i ask for
you are not a 'pengongkong tegar'
but
i know you can control me in any circumstances that made you felt curious about
you are not that hard person
but you need a detail explainations in everything i dos and plans
yeah
i know
i need to explain and you need to hear what im saying and love to do
so do i
i will hear you too
you are my Savior
never had a pengkid, like a knight for me, an amour...

you, you are
for me
insyaAllah, till the times that we can't never decide when
need to stand for what we had
and never give-up and saying cursing words
esspecially 'bre^&%^*&%$@^-up'

battery flat

got to go

xoxoxo

25 January 2013

When the sucks life ends, and begins with the new life ahead

assalamualaikum WBT

since forever i didn't write anything in my own precious blog
by the time passed, i would like to thank to Allah because giving me such a wonderful time in life
college, love life, family and myself
all in one being such a great days ahead that should be thankful of

so much things happened when im leaving my blog
i just get over with my previous love and bulid a new one which is i never intend to do before
she's my backbone and she's also my supporter for my lost souls and strengths

this time
i absolutely demanded to have a better life in any circumstances
although we at first struggling to find our platform to be stable and comfort
by the time passed, we manage to be together and still remains as two

somehow, we may not be able to face it, but
through all the discussions, tolerating in any problems we had and also understanding in which we put all the trust in one place,
insyaAllah,,, we will be succeed and excellent in our own path and also plans to do

later on, i'll be in touch with my wall again soon

xoxoxo